Announcer: “Kudo and Kimura in the Morning” has been on hiatus for quite some time because the co-hosts, former Ghost shortstop Naizen Kimura and second baseman Sadao Kudo, have been serving as minor league coaches in the Ghosts’ farm system.  But now, with the 2018 Playoffs firmly underway, ESPN-Japan proudly announces the return of Kudo and Kimura in the Morning!

[Cue theme song:

It’s Kudo and Kimura in the Morning!

They make sure that baseball’s never boring!

If you listen, you never will be snoring!

Oh, it’s Kudo and Kimura in the Morning!]

Kudo: Goooooood morning, konichiwa, everyone.  We are thrilled to be back.  Naizen Kimura! Welcome back my, brother!

Kimura:  Arigatou gozaimasu, my friend.  Its good to be back.  Why did we ever leave?  Coaching in the minors doesn’t pay very much.  Not like ESPN!

Kudo:  We’re coaching because we love…. the League of the RISING SUNNNNNN!

Kimura:  Uh, chill, dude.

Kudo: And of course we couldn’t return at a better time — the playoffs are underway!  As you know, Naizen, over in the Bright Blade Group, the battle between the Naha Sisha and the Fushigi Yugi Celestial Warriors is very close.  Game One was a nailbiter, with the favored Sisha winning in 11 innings.  But the Warriors rebounded quickly — winning games 2 and 3 convincingly.  The remaining games should be exciting!

Kimura:  Just as exciting were the first three playoff games in the Shining Star Group, where the Shin Seiki Evas managed to take all three games against the Ghosts but only by the skin of their pearly white teeth!

Kudo:  That’s right, and that brings us to our very special guest this morning, none other than the longtime and very successful General Manager of the Evas, Kevin Vail!  Welcome Kevin!

Vail:  Hey guys, how are you doin’?

Kimura:  We’re great, other than having our favorite team down by three games. But hell, that’s baseball!

Kudo:  Kevin, dude, I’ve got to ask you — what’s with the mask?

Kimura:  Yeah, and what’s with the heavy breathing?  Sounds like you’re suffocating in that thing!

Vail:  Well, you see, there was this accident….

Kudo:  Accident?   I heard you wear that outfit just to intimidate your trading partners (laughter).

Vail:  Yes, well, there’s that too…

Kudo:  Is it true you make your front office staff call you ‘Lord Vail’?  I read that on the internet, so it must be true.

Vail:  No, I don’t make them call me that, they just choose too.

Kimura:  Yeah, I’m sure.  Anyway, you must be happy as a pig in sushi about your team’s start in the playoffs.  Up three games to none.  Looks like you’re a lock for the Neo Tokyo Cup battle!

Vail:  Well, thanks, but I for one won’t count the Ghosts out.  Nii is a nasty squad.

Kimura:  Yes, I’ve heard you say that.  But three games to none!  Quite the surprise!

Vail:  I didn’t see that coming either. Winning two in our last-at bat was cutting things very close. Goes to show the importance of home field though. These opening round series are really stacked heavily against the wildcard teams.

Kudo:  And your starters came through, big time.

Vail:  I was very happy to see a good start from Hobo. I paid dearly to get him and he just came through in a big way.

Kimura:  So, Lord Vail, tell me, your club keeps winning the SSG but you have only one Neo Tokyo Cup to show for it.  Lots of other clubs kind of feel your clubs are just…. (puts hands to neck and makes gagging sounds).

Kudo:  Yes, Lord Vail, is that why you dealt for Hobo?  Feeling like this year’s club would just be another choker?

Vail:  Not that I have any expectations of winning every year against the stiff competition in the LRS, but I would have thought I would have gotten at least 2 championships during this past 8 season span. Well if nothing else, it pushes me to try to refine the formula further. The “Hobo” deal I made this year that pushed me pretty far out of my comfort zone in an effort to construct a more playoff friendly roster. Hopefully it helps.

Kudo:  Well, its certainly looking that way, being up three games to none.  Of course, if the Ghosts come back…

Kimura:  …that would be….

Vail:  Yes, I know.  It would be the ultimate choke,

Kimura:  I’d call it the ‘Eva Destruction.”  Har har!  Get it?  ‘Eva Destruction’?

Kudo:  You said it Naizen!  Get ready for some sleepless nights, Lord Vail!

Kimura:  Oh, and by the way, here’s our artist’s rendering of the rest of the SSG series:

Kudo:  That’s beautiful!  Not that we’re biased or anything!  Anyway, we’re out of time.  Thank you Kevin Vail, GM of the Eva Empire.

Vail:  Sure, anytime, guys (shakes head in dismay).

Kimura:  Yes, Lord Vail, go get ready for the resumption of the LRS playoff series.  I can’t wait!

Kudo:  Thanks to everyone for tuning in and please return tomorrow for another look at the crazy happenings in the… League of the Rising Suuuuuuunnnnnn!

[Cue theme song:]

It’s Kudo and Kimura in the Morning!

They make sure that baseball’s never boring!

If you listen, you never will be snoring!

Oh, it’s Kudo and Kimura in the Morning!