4/12/2009: Gloucester, MA – A press conference was called yesterday at the Dockside Coliseum parking lot to update fans on the 5,000 seat stadium addition.  Delays to the completion of the stadium forced the sparsely attended press conference into the parking lot.  A disappointed co-owner Benjamin Fingerhut opened in an agitated mood.  “We hold a press conference and only 5 reporters show up?  What the hell else is there going on in Gloucester that you have to cover?  Another yarn convention?  We’re the only show in town and we get 5 reporters?  I knew we never should’ve bought this…” before his mic was apparently shut off.

The Fingerhut brothers have had an up and down relationship with the fans of the Fishermen since purchasing the team last year.  Despite raising ticket prices in their first move with the team, they also raised expectations by leading the team to its first playoff appearance.  Immediately following the first-round defeat they announced plans to expand the stadium 5,000 seats as well as plans to not re-sign their star player Vicente Bernal, who has since signed overseas in Japan.

“We called you here to update you on the progress of the stadium expansion project,” David chimed in.  “After delaying the start of the project and problems with various organizations we’ve finally begun progress on the stadium.”

The stadium renovation has been plagued by problems ever since it began after the season ended.  An unexpected playoff push delayed breaking ground, which was followed by a union strike.  “I don’t know what to tell you,” David continued with his voice trembling in disgust.  “I’ve never liked unions and I still don’t like them.”  Benjamin chimed in, “Making the playoffs last year really threw the stadium renovation into disarray.  I mean, how the hell did we make the playoffs last year?  Did you see our roster?  We had zero power and even less team speed.  Nobody really thought we'd make the playoffs, did they?  Let's just say I lost a lot of money in Vegas on the Fishermen last year.”

David added, “I had a conversation with manager Stuart Curry about putting me in the lineup because I'm a lefty.  It was that bad at one point.”  Later Curry responded to this claim by saying, "I have no statement about this alleged conversation… I have two years left on my contract."

After the local bricklayers union began plans to strike, it was rumored that the colorful owners threatened to put their major league players to work on expanding the stadium themselves.  When asked about this David first denied the claim, but seemed to shed some light on it when he said, “Harley Robertson can’t hit a ball out of the park to save his life.  Abel Montgomery hasn’t stolen a base since little league.  I thought maybe they could pick up a shovel, 'cause they damn well can't pick up a curve ball.”  It was rumored that the player’s union got wind of the situation and quickly put an end to the plan.  “Like I said, I don’t like unions,” David said when pressed, but refused to go further, visibly biting his tongue.

After dolling out over 100 million dollars in contracts the past few months, the Fingerhut brothers seemed to be in a spending mood as of late.  “Everybody gets a contract.  You want a contract?  You want a contract?  Who wants more of my money?” was heard echoing through the halls of Dockside Coliseum by Benjamin Fingerhut last week.  “We need a corporate sponsor and we need one quick,” he added.  At the press conference he was a little more in check.  “We’ve talked to a few local corporations about potentially sponsoring the stadium to help pay for the renovation, but Betsy’s Best Scrapbooking and Tom’s ‘Till Midnight don’t seem to have an extra ten million bucks sitting around,” referring to a local business and saloon.  “How did this city get a franchise in the first place?  I’m telling you, we’re the only game in town and we get five reporters to show up to…” his microphone once again was cut off.

“The bottom line is this, we made the playoffs last year and we’ve signed a few big names to our roster this year and it’s time the fans paid the price, ‘cause it ain't comin’ out of my pocket,” said David Fingerhut.  “And it ain’t comin’ out of my brother’s pocket either,” he added.

The added 5,000 seats push the capacity of still generically-named Dockside Coliseum to 40,000.  No word on whether there will be an increase in ticket prices.