NLN: BREAKING NEWS

by Francis Ferry, NLN beat writer

October 8, 2011: Bakersfield, California – The PEBA playoffs are in full swing and the Borealis find themselves up on the Bakersfield Bears 2-0 despite the season-ending (and 2012-ending) shoulder injury to Miguel García, and the missed turn due to the flu of George Thompson.  A strong effort by the bullpen – Artie Tillman in particular – and the Borealis outslugging the Bears sends the teams to Bakersfield for Game 3 while rumors abound the PEBA as reports are cropping up regarding the ownership questions reported earlier here in the Northern Lights News.  ESPN is reporting that Chris Rodriguez’s position with the team is closer to 50% ownership, much higher than originally speculated, while FOX News reports the whole mess as a hoax aimed at drawing attention away from the real story in the PEBA – the surprising ascent of the Tempe Knights.

It is no secret that Rodriguez is highly critical of how the team has been run this season, and the prospects of a coup is sending shivers throughout the organization and baseball as a whole.  Any dispute over control of the team could have long-range effects on its success.

Prior to Aurora’s attempt to sweep Bakersfield in Game 3 of the Sovereign League playoffs, Chris Rodriguez held a press conference outside The Chocolate Factory at Yum! Field to address rumors regarding his ownership of the Borealis.

“First, I’d like to start out expressing my sheer disappointment over how the team has been handled this season.  Falling short of last season’s record is highly upsetting and the finger can squarely be pointed only one place.”  And with that, Rodriguez pointed in a westerly direction.

“There have been moves which have stunted our organization’s growth.  These moves have undone the long, hard planning I have undertaken in my four years at the helm of the Aurora Borealis.  The loss of top-notch prospects such as Stephen Longchamps and major league talent like Kuemon Kiyomizu is absolutely scandalous.  Attendance is down for the first time in years!”  With that, Rodriguez moved his hands from a pointing for emphasis motion to hands held outward in a sense of shock.  “The loss of young arms Bradley and García clearly is due to mismanagement.  They were worked too hard.  Our loss in the playoffs will be because of this poor decision-making.

“Today I am here to tell you that this despicable decay of my franchise is about to come to an end.  I stand before you to outline a plan; my plan for getting the Borealis back on track.  Despite public belief after the March 28^th announcement that the Aurora Borealis have been sold to Mikey Topham, the reality is that I possess a 25% interest in the team.”  The assembled press murmured loudly in shock, rapidly shuffling with their phones, quickly placing calls and sending abbreviated typed text messages to their news outlets.  Some called out questions that were lost amongst all the noise.

“It is my goal to have taken over complete control of the franchise before the first pitch on Opening Day 2012.  I plan on using any and all legal actions if needed against Mikey and his little ‘Boy Wonderful’,” saying that last part with an ugly sneer on his face, “preventing them from making any transactions during the offseason without my consent.  I will burst their bubble right here: They want to let Steve Williamson go?  No chance.  He will stay.  They are looking to move Aaron Turner, a good Borealii.  Over my dead body!”  Gesticulating harder with each point of emphasis, Rodriguez was almost frothing at the mouth.  “That no good Pexego?  Gone.  What good is he doing us now?”

The crowd of reporters stopped their texting, their calls, their scribbling in tiny notebooks and instead looked at each other in stunned silence, jaws hung in disbelief.  “I will not at this time address how I came to own 25% of the club.  The simple fact is that I do, and Golden Entertainment will sell to me.  I guarantee it.”