by Roberta Umor, Yuma Sun

5 May 2020—Yuma, AZ: Last night, in the cool winds coming off Mt. Rose, Gunner MacGruder hurled a perfect game against the Reno Zephyrs.

What more needs be said?

27 up, 27 down. 8 Ks, 9 ground ball outs, and 10 balls in the air and caught. Gunner needed only 98 pitches to complete his masterpiece. 72 were strikes.

Unbelievable.

By the seventh inning, even Reno’s usually vociferous fans were pulling for Gunner on every pitch. By the time the ninth rolled around, and Gunner dispatched the final three outs on just eight pitches (strikeout, ground out, fly out), it seemed like the entire city of Reno was rooting for the Dozer mound magician.

Meanwhile, back in Yuma, fans poured out of the downtown bars moments after the final pitch, yelling and cheering and stumbling into the streets, stopping what little traffic Yuma has late at night. Wary downtown business owners called the police and waited for the town’s crack anti-riot squad to show up in their brand-spanking-new riot gear.

The police never showed.

When the young crowd realized the police weren’t coming, the partying escalated to looting. Several shop windows were smashed, a half dozen businesses suffered loss of merchandise, and graffiti sprang up on walls and windows throughout Old Town. Some of the signs said “Go Dozers!” Others celebrated the Dozer ace left-hander with pictographs of guns and kilts. One strange image, spray painted on one of the exterior walls of John Deere Stadium, showed a very angry baseball in flight, perhaps intimidating the hitter into not hitting the mad ball. Further down the stadium wall, one local artist had begun a sketch of Gunner in motion.

Though unfinished (interrupted by noisy rioters?), it was titled and signed, “Gunning Them Down, by Drue Kataoka.”But the vast majority of the graffiti simply repeated the name of the star hurler over and over: “Gunner, Gunner, Gunner.”

Graffiti is expensive to remove. Broken windows cost to replace. So though no one was injured in the riot, shop owners were understandably nervous as the rioting continued late into the night.

The Mayor was notified. He tried to contact the Police Chief, but kept getting the same recorded message: “Police Chief Lekan is not taking calls right now. He is busy securing the streets of Yuma and protecting its citizens. He will return your call when the city is once again safe and quiet. Leave your name and number, thank you.”

But the Chief wasn’t downtown securing the streets. Instead, he was spotted at a local bar, after hours, drinking with several other officers. “Let ‘em run,” he said, referring to the rioters. “They’ll tire soon enough.”

When asked what the point of having a riot squad was if they weren’t going to prevent a riot, the Chief laughed. “Riot? This is no riot. This here’s a celebration. You know what happened tonight in Reno? Don’t ya think that deserves a little celebration? To honor the great Gunner MacGruder? This is nothing more than an awards ceremony, not to worry. Hell, half my men are out there celebrating with the rest of the town.”

And so they were.

By dawn the next morning, the streets had quieted. The celebrants headed home, or fell asleep in the riverside park, or wandered over to Anna’s Mexican Food, where breakfast was being served. Huevos rancheros, chorizos con papas, and warm tortillas. The perfect finish to an evening of rioting.

No one was hurt, no one arrested, and businesses suffered minor damages and limited losses due to looting. Not bad for a night of rioting in a city without police protection.

One man would lose his job, one woman her business, and one young pitcher would never ever be as good as he was for one magical night.