Go Big or Go Home

by Dylan - Toyama

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

William PetersenWilliam Petersen of the Kentucky Thoroughbreds is one of the grandest players in the PEBA.  In 2010, he won the IL Wunderkind Award, and his 34 home runs this past season saw him finish in the top 10 in Royal Raker Award voting.  However, he’s also considered grand in the same sense that he’s known by the nickname “Pork and Beans”, a reference to his rather large girth.  You see, Peterson had the highest BMI of any player in the PEBA.  At 6’ 0” and 242 pounds, his BMI is 32.8.

Pork and BeansHowever, Petersen has now been surpassed.  There’s a new Mongo in town, selected in the Rule 5 draft and slated for the big league roster with the Duluth Warriors.  That player is first baseman Carlos Colón, who tips the scales at 257 lbs. and stands 6’ 2” tall.  Duluth’s GM was defensive about his team’s commitment to Colón.  “Carlos is not fat; he is clearly big-boned, and thus he generates as lot of power with his legs,” Bill McKenzie said.  “We really like his batting eye and ability to select good pitches to hit.  We don’t see his size as a problem in terms of baseball skills.  Except for the one time he collapsed on the way to first base.  And sometimes the bat slips out of h is hands because it gets greasy.  And I’ve heard occasionally he’s had to cut his glove off his hand because it got stuck.”

However, it’s not entirely clear that McKenzie is content to let the team’s Fatty Bolger maintain the status quo.  “On second thought,” McKenzie continued, “the Warriors will be bringing Carlos up to Duluth early for a nutrition and training program.  No more tamales for him – only healthy walleye and pike for Señor Colón these days.  And I would expect Carlos to be playing a lot of DH this season.”

Even if the Warriors possess the largest player in the PEBA, they’re certainly not alone in harboring players of unusual size.  Throughout the PEBA, there are 38 players with a BMI of 30.0 or greater who currently sit on a 40-man roster.  These players are distributed throughout 20 of the 24 teams in the league, Duluth and Canton having four such players each.  The only teams without such a player are New Jersey, San Antonio, Kalamazoo and Palm Springs.  Given that a BMI of 30.0 or greater is typically considered obese, that just begs to have the following question answered: What’s the best team you could put together from this list of all 30+ BMI guys?  Here’s our 25-man roster:

Catcher:

C Manuel González (OMA) – 5’ 11”, 217 lbs., 30.3 BMI – $16,500,000 – 2012 PEBA: .280 AVG, 28 HR, 78 RBI, 90 BB, 0 SB

C Raúl Espinoza (FAR) – 5’ 11”, 220 lbs., 30.7 BMI – $400,000 – 2012 PEBA: .239 AVG, 11 HR, 62 RBI, 89 BB, 0 SB

There’s no catcher in the league with a BMI of 31 or higher and only 11 such players total, but four catchers qualify for consideration on this team.  González is pretty good with the bat, and Espinoza’s not too bad, either.  Neither has a great arm, but you could do a lot worse.

First Base:

1B William Petersen (KEN) – 6’ 0”, 242 lbs., 32.8 BMI – $5,000,000 – 2012 PEBA: .321 AVG, 34 HR, 104 RBI, 58 BB, 0 SB

1B Rubén Cruz (CST) – 6’ 5”, 254 lbs., 30.1 BMI – $12,000,000 – 2012 PEBA: .331 AVG, 21 HR, 85 RBI, 86 BB, 0 SB

There’s a full nine first basemen that qualify for this team; not too surprising since this position is usually manned by a power hitter and large players tend to hit the ball a long way.  Unfortunately, there aren’t enough middle infielders or outfielders, so any of the first basemen with defensive flexibility get pimped out to other positions.  That leaves the best of the rest to fight it out for first base and DH.  The best combo of bat and defense remaining is Petersen.  The best bat after that is down in the DH slot, which leaves room for one last player: Cruz.  Sadly, Carlos Colón gets the shaft, and yes, you’ve got to love a team where Cruz is the last position player you select to be on it.

Second Base:

2B Chris Holmes (CL) – 5’ 10”, 210 lbs., 30.1 BMI – $8,000,000 – 2012 PEBA: .330 AVG, 23 HR, 97 RBI, 78 BB, 0 SB

Holmes really came into his own in 2012 and earned a contract extension to match.  He’s got great range to boot.  Nothing lost at a position where you wouldn’t necessarily expect a great player.  Connecticut’s George John, who’s a pretty decent player (albeit different than Holmes), falls at the other end of the spectrum, with the lowest BMI of any second baseman.

Third Base:

1B António Coronado (GLO) – 5’ 8”, 206 lbs., 31.3 BMI – $13,400,000 – 2012 PEBA: .302 AVG, 23 HR, 96 RBI, 81 BB, 9 SB

3B Jeff Goulding (MAN) – 5’ 8”, 197 lbs., 30.0 BMI – $400,000 – 2012 AAA: .278 AVG, 5 HR, 52 RBI, 64 BB, 0 SB

Goulding would love to be placed on a team with these requirements, as he doesn’t appear too likely to get much of a shot with the Maulers.  On this team, however, he’s the saving grace of the infield.  He can play all of the infield positions quite well, which makes him the perfect bench player to spell either middle infielder or come in as a defensive replacement for Coronado.  For his part, Coronado’s arm isn’t too bad; he’s just a bit limited in flexibility, so he generally makes more sense across the diamond, where the Fishermen regularly play him.

Shortstop:

2B Ángel Zarate (FAR) – 6’ 0”, 224 lbs., 30.4 BMI – $6,400,000 – 2012 PEBA: .194 AVG, 4 HR, 25 RBI, 92 BB, 10 SB

There isn’t a single player in the PEBA with a BMI over 30.0 that plays shortstop as their primary position, and only Holmes and Zarate fit the bill as second basemen.  That means that Fargo’s Zarate is the guy who’s forced to short.  His average is lousy but he walks enough to be a useful player.  If either he or Holmes gets hurt, Goulding is forced into regular duty and there’s no one to act as a defensive backup anymore.

Left Field:

LF Nick Miller (FAR) – 6’ 0”, 227 lbs., 30.8 BMI – MLC – 2012 PEBA: .263 AVG, 3 HR, 20 RBI, 9 BB, 0 SB

1B Mike Pugh (YUM) – 6’ 1”, 230 lbs., 30.3 BMI – MLC – 2012 AA: .273 AVG, 9 HR, 65 RBI, 38 BB, 0 SB

There are a couple of ways to address left field, and it might depend on the home park this team played in.  A small left field would allow a manager to consider playing a guy with no experience there (one of the eligible first basemen, perhaps) and get a big bat into the lineup at the expense of defense.  Assuming that’s not an option, you’re left with Miller and Pugh as possible guys.  Pugh’s not someone you really want here either defensively or offensively.  He may yet develop into a viable PEBA hitter but he’s never played above AA, so you’d be risking a lot on that.  That leaves you with Miller and a gaping defensive hole in right field.  However, there is someone with a bat that’s good enough to warrant playing him in right.  Read on…

Big BurgerCenter Field:

RF John Kelley (DUL) – 5’ 11”, 220 lbs., 30.7 BMI – $600,000 – 2012 PEBA: .256 AVG, 7 HR, 31 RBI, 18 BB, 0 SB

There isn’t another player who could possibly be slated for regular centerfield duties, so Kelley is the choice for this team.  Heck, there isn’t really anyone else who makes sense as the backup here.  He gets hurt and the team is going to have to play Miller here and Pugh in left.  That’s a pretty ugly outfield defense given who’s slated for right field on a team that, as you’ll see later, is going to need its defense.

Right Field:

1B Ronald Harmon (WV) – 6’ 3”, 245 lbs., 30.6 BMI – $400,000 – 2012 PEBA: .286 AVG, 34 HR, 100 RBI, 59 BB, 1 SB

Miller’s presence on the Dinosaurs’ roster is in question for 2013 but he’s the only reasonable defensive option for right field.  Of course, he’s off in left field.  Harmon would be a bit of a statue out there, but his bat is miles ahead of Miller’s and Pugh’s.  What you’re really looking at, then, is whether you want Pugh in left and Miller in right or Miller in left and Harmon in right, and the answer to that shouldn’t take long to figure.

Designated Hitter:

DH Octávio Pexego (AUR) – 6’ 1”, 240 lbs., 31.7 BMI – $9,950,000 – 2012 PEBA: .318 AVG, 35 HR, 162 RBI, 99 BB, 0 SB

As always, the easiest position on a roster to fill.  Just get the best bat of whoever’s left and put him here.  That’s Pexego and his 3rd-highest BMI in the PEBA.  A case could be made to bat Cruz at DH and have Pexego ride the pine, but really, when you’ve got Petersen, Cruz and Pexego to fill two slots in the lineup, you’ve got a happy problem.

Projected Lineup:

  1. Holmes – 2B
  2. González – C
  3. Pexego – DH
  4. Petersen – 1B
  5. Harmon – RF
  6. Coronado – 3B
  7. Zarate – SS
  8. Kelley – CF
  9. Miller – LF

The top six in the order will make opposing pitchers weep.  Zarate is a relatively easy out if you can get him to swing the bat.  Then you’ve got Kelley and Miller, who are going to feel like ugly ducklings each time they walk back to the bench from home plate without having circled the bases first.

Starting Rotation:

  1. SP Ed Mitchell (NO) – 6’ 0”, 222 lbs., 30.1 BMI – $400,000 – 2012 PEBA: 7-13, 4.92 ERA, 175.6 IP, 144 K, 50 BB
  2. SP León Rivera (OMA) – 5’ 11”, 215 lbs., 30.0 BMI – $600,000 – 2012 PEBA: 13-10, 4.28 ERA, 210.3 IP, 118 K, 40 BB
  3. SP Kevin Hollins (ARL) – 5’ 10”, 215 lbs., 30.8 BMI – MLC – 2012 PEBA: 0-1, 7.02 ERA, 16.6 IP, 14 K, 11 BB
  4. SP Ed O’Bryan (CON) – 5’ 10”, 210 lbs., 30.1 BMI – MLC – 2012 AAA: 12-6, 3.10 ERA, 159.6 IP, 99 K, 59 BB
  5. SP Owen Page (DUL) – 6’ 1”, 235 lbs., 31.0 BMI – MLC – 2012 AAA: 5-7, 3.79 ERA, 90.3 IP, 71 K, 38 BB

This rotation would be improved a fair amount just by asking New Jersey’s Jerry Jones to eat another cheeseburger – he missed qualifying by just 1 pound.  To put it bluntly, starting pitching is going to be a serious problem!  You probably have to slot Mitchell or Rivera as the team’s “ace”, and that’s not something to look forward to.  Hollins was quite good in AAA Newport this past season but hasn’t done much to impress PEBA hitters.  Then you round out the rotation (no pun intended) with Page and O’Bryan, who haven’t even faced PEBA hitters yet.  While both have been decent in the minors, neither is a sure thing to be any better than Hollins, which isn’t very good.

Closer:

Enrico Rosado (BAK) – 5’ 8”, 200 lbs., 30.4 BMI – $400,000 – 2012 PEBA: 3-1, 10 SV, 1.46 ERA, 68 IP, 79 K, 24 BB

Rosado’s a legitimate relief ace and would likely get plenty of opportunities to ply his trade.  Given the power hitting tendencies of the top of the lineup and the lack of experience in the rotation, one would expect to see a lot of high-scoring close games.  Rosado can likely be counted upon to clean up if the team can just get him the ball.

Middle Relief:

Charlie Swan (CAN) – 5’ 10”, 213 lbs., 30.6 BMI – $3,744,000 – 2012 PEBA: 0-4, 19 SV, 3.95 ERA, 66 IP, 47 K, 29 BB

Michael Smallbridge (FLO) – 5’ 8”, 200 lbs., 30.4 BMI – $400,000 – 2012 PEBA: 7-1, 6 SV, 2.87 ERA, 69 IP, 67 K, 31 BB

Michinori Endo (WV) – 6’ 0”, 221 lbs., 30.0 BMI – $3,000,000 – 2012 PEBA: 2-3, 1 SV, 3.69 ERA, 68.1 IP, 58 K, 26 BB

Richard Thomas (LON) – 5’ 7”, 199 lbs., 31.2 BMI – $660,000 – 2012 PEBA: 4-3, 3 SV, 3.54 ERA, 76.3 IP, 60 K, 34 BB

Francisco Chávez (AUR) – 5’ 7”, 200 lbs., 31.3 BMI – MLC – 2012 PEBA: 4-2, 1 SV, 4.80 ERA, 60 IP, 57 K, 26 BB

Roberto Bustamente (CST) – 5’ 10”, 220 lbs., 31.6 BMI – $400,000 – 2012 PEBA: 3-1, 1 SV, 3.86 ERA, 35 IP, 34 K, 9 BB

With Enrico Rosado closing and this group of relievers, the bullpen doesn’t look nearly as bad as the rotation.  Swan and Smallbridge are solid relievers who can be counted upon for a good outing on most occasions.  Endo, Thomas and Chávez aren’t up to that level, and the latter two even have the ability to start a game when needed, so there’s some flexibility there.  Bustamente is just 19 years old, hardly walks anyone and is getting better.

Summary:

This would be a team that is heavily reliant on offense and the bullpen for success.  The total payroll is $85,054,000 for 2013, but $73,850,000 is budgeted for the offensive side.  While 21 pitchers qualify to make this team, the lack of quality is rather noticeable.  There are a couple of very good relievers in the group included, but heft and starting pitching do not go very well in the PEBA.  Many on the pitching side are either early in their career or have been stuck in the minors for a while.  If you were looking to save some money with this squad, you could remove Rubén Cruz’s $12 million from the bench and replace him with Canton’s Ryosei Kichikawa or Raymond White, either of whom would make the league minimum.

Joel SwedloveOn The Other Hand:

Kalamazoo third basemen Joel Swedlove is the slimmest player in the PEBA with a BMI of 18.4 (6’ 2”, 143 lbs.).  His small stature belies his strength, which no one can deny after he’s belted 30 or more home runs each of the past two seasons.  Of the five other players with a BMI under 20.0, four of them are playing at the highest level in the PEBA, including two on the same team.  I’ll leave it to the reader to look those players up.

Those Left Off The 25-Man Roster:

Here’s a list of the remaining players who qualified for this team (BMI>=30.0) but were left off the 25-man roster:

Samuel Platt covers the Nutmeggers for the Connecticut Post

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