CRYSTAL LAKE HERALD

SPORTS – GNATS NOW
GM Ermola‘s State of the League Finance Report
Updated: November 7th, 2029 – 8:30 PM

By Howard Heskin, Gnats Beat Writer and ESPN PEBA Correspondent – Twitter @HowardHeskin1

With only four people in attendance of this year’s press conference, GM RJ Ermola of the Sandgnats stepped out to announce the finance report of PEBA for 2029 at the Country Inn & Suites by Radisson, Crystal Lake, IL (Breakfast Included). Duluth GM Ricky McCoy sat up front with his famous green binder, next to GM Ken Hannahs on a lay over flight from Las Vegas with a large coffee in hand seated next to Featherheads owner Drew Streets. Streets was laying on the floor of the conference room yelling his assistant for forgetting to have his refurbished classic Learjet 70 registration renewed thus having to take first class with a red eye layover in Chicago on their way back to Jacksonville from Las Vegas. With all four in attendance RJ Ermola proceeded to review the league finance report with 100 power point slides. I also passed out halfway through, but learned the following information:

League Revenue: $4,778,734,972
League Expenses: $4,727,319,452
Net Revenue: $51,415,520

Highest Revenue: Shin Seiki – $257,711,561
Lowest Revenue: Charleston – $99,800,651

Standard Deviation in Revenue – $49,866,998
Net Standard Deviation in Revenue after revenue sharing – $34,408,229

In summary, league expenses have grown consistent with the expansion to an all time high as well as the standard deviation between high and low revenue teams. However, as a whole the league moved into the black to make a net profit. A good sign for future financial health was a flat average revenue despite adding two expansion teams with below average revenue.