There's Only One Bryan Dobney... Thank God

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#1 Post by **Coqui** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 11:48 am

There's Only One Bryan Dobney... Thank God ( Public )

Contributed by Canton Longshoremen
Thursday, 13 March 2008
a rebuttal by Frank Terry, Canton Repository

9/9/2007: Canton, OH - I signed on to the PEBA news wire today expecting to read the usual stories. Per chance there would be another "10 Questions" with a Bears player or maybe the Calzones Corner would have been updated. What I did not expect was an article calling in to question my journalistic integrity. I know that the Omaha-Canton rivalry is quite heated, but I never expected this.

For starters, I did not know that Mike Owen was a part owner of the Cyclones. What I do know, and what is accepted as truth by nearly everyone but the delusional GM of the Cyclones, is that Owen has been pants this year in the Premiership. Everyone knows that football (soccer) is truly the beautiful game and Owen, when good, was one of the great artists. That said, he is absolute rubbish now. It's not even debatable.

I resent the statements made by Bryan Dobney, a small, classless man with unruly hair. True to his usual form, he did not come to me with any problems, but aired them in public instead. Now, he is a tremendous announcer in his spare time, but that does not excuse his behavior now. So yes, Bryan, the heat in the rivalry will be more intense than ever, but it is you and your sad sack owner that are causing the problems. Not this beacon of journalistic integrity.

-----Campbell's Corner-----
Well I felt the need to weigh in on the footy issue here. For one, who cares about Mike Owen or Newcastle anyway? R-e-l-e-g-a-t-i-o-n. Learn to spell that one, Bryan; you're going to need it. Anyone out there looking to support a real club could join me, and our GM Brad Dobney, in our unabashed reverence for all things Chelsea. Dobney – whose family actually hails from Chelsea – and I often host football parties to watch games on Sunday afternoons. After some explanation that this was not an NFL party our attendance has dropped, but the faithful few remain.

I can't explain in writing how much I love the beautiful game. It's a shame to see Mike Owen attach his once illustrious name to a team like Omaha. KTBFFH.

#2 Post by **John** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 1:02 pm

There's a storm brewing... two brothers heading to war...

Tyler · #3 Post by **Tyler** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 1:12 pm

Too bad it can't be for, say, the division title or something.

#4 Post by **Coqui** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 2:16 pm

Hey, he started it.

Jason · #5 Post by **Jason** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 2:35 pm

Erroneous! Erroneous on both counts!!! You had to drag Owen into this knowing full well it would draw a reaction. Of course, judging by your team, perhaps I am giving you too much credit in the brains department. The fact remains, Omaha was duty bound to protect the good name of its part owner from the slanderous pen of one Frank Terry. You have one day.

#6 Post by **Coqui** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 2:42 pm

Hey, the aptly name Frank Terry just calls it as he sees it. My starters suck this year, so does Michael Owen. Let's face it, the man is a hard sneeze away from a double hip replacement.

Am I sorry I incited you by calling him pants? No. Did I know it was going to make you have a hissy fit? Yes. Sorry, call me when you are in the top 10 and maybe then we can talk footy. Meanwhile, I am going to get psyched for the next CL game while you ponder Derby's only win on the year.

#7 Post by **John** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 2:47 pm

Do I get any credit for linking to that God-awful singer mocking Owen? For the record, I included that not so much to disparage Owen as to marvel at how terrible that dude's singing was.

#8 Post by **Coqui** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 2:50 pm

Borealis - Commissioner wrote:Do I get any credit for linking to that God-awful singer mocking Owen?

That depends on how mad Bryan gets about it. This is just as fun in a message board and I don't have to worry about him attacking me.

Jason · #9 Post by **Jason** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 3:00 pm

As much of an Owen fan as I am, that song was pretty funny. While the Longshoremen continue to wallow in the depths of their self-created whirlwind of contreversy and suck...itude, the Cyclones and their intrepid, irreplacable part owner Michael Owen will choose to rise above the strife and focus on the season at hand. I will try to write an article that puts what it feels like to have a .500 record as a mathematical possibility or how well I sleep knowing I have bullpen ERA over a point lower than yours into words. Until I can get those feelings down on paper, I guess I will leave you with the advice that you may want to spend less time calling into question the soccer abilities of superior teams' part owners and more time finding a SP with a sub-4 ERA. But, if I know the petty and jealous ways of the Longshoremen FO, which I do, this is far from over. I just miss the days when there was some honor in the field of sports journalism.