F HEAD GRUMBLES -- THE END OF AN ERA?

[KenH]

F Head Grumbles – THE END OF AN ERA?

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

It has come from a source HIGH UP in the Featherheads organization that the helmsmen of the organization are – despite all recognizable sources to the contrary – considering a NAME CHANGE.

“I really shouldn’t be saying anything, but recently Drew [Streets] has started being… involved with a woman who has been trying to sway him,” a source close to the breaking news has stated. “Listen, I really can’t even say anything so you CAN’T attach my name to this, but there is stuff changing here. Serious stuff.”

When asked to further elaborate on the situation at hand, the source close the higher ups in the organization stated only that they “had to go” and that they would communicate again soon the future.

It’s been no secret that the Florida Featherheads – although sanctioned early on by the native tribes in the area – has been a sore spot for the PEBA brand going into the last 7-8 years. There are passionate voices on either side of the debate, with many coming down on the side of it being a name that honors the history of the native tribes of Florida. Yet others contend that the name connotes a dark time in our country’s past that paints a hurtful and excessively broad stereotype of the first occupants of the land.

While no one has all the answers, it’s clear that the comments from the Scottish owner at the beginning of the 2029 season have resounded with many in the Featherheads front office.

For instance, take the up until 2023 7th inning “rain dance” that was concluded among the center field batter’s eye. This notorious event led even the most ardent supporters of the Featherheads traditions to stop and take note of the dismaying sense of cultural appropriation. For many, this event and others like it has led to almost constant protests among baseball fans of the team’s name and iconography.

Will this lead to real change of the branding and identity of one of the PEBA’s most reconignizable franchises? This has yet to be seen, although there have already been photos of Drew Streets entering the buildings of large marketing firms as of late. Who is to say that these are not the initial drafts of what will be, perhaps, the largest rebranding effort thus seen for the still-young PEBA league?

Update: Prior to publishing this draft of the story, your intrepid reporter managed to glean further information from his source…

“What I can say is that it is space-themed. Cape Canaveral, all of that… I don’t think they’ve come to a final consensus as to what the team name is, but I can tell you they’ve been at it for a while now. They’re not taking it easily. They want to do it right.”

We reached out to some native activist groups who have been in the forefront of the battle with the Florida Featherheads…

“It’s not that we necessarily even want them to rebrand… its that we want them to stop with their over-the-top portrayals of our culture. It’s a bridge too far to see men and women in the stands wearing native American headdresses. It’s offensive. We hope that they will come to a decision that can perhaps portray our people in a more positive light. We look forward to any input we can provide in this process – assuming that the executives are actually considering a rebranding campaign.”

More on this story as it evolves…

[Lions]

Florida Space Cadets!

[Sandgnats]

Streets is becoming woke!

[Borealis]

Streets is becoming woke!