This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

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This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#1 Post by Sandgnats »

This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats
By: Stephanie Dole
December 26, 2023 at 6:00 PM EST

In this first edition of the Sandgnats blog my father Mr. Sydney Dole has asked me to put a vote to the fan base regarding this year's mascot.

Do we go back to the beloved old mascot?

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The logo features Gnic (pronounced "Nick") the Gnat, an anthropomorphized bug with those signature dagger teeth, a warped baseball bat and sunglasses. And comping from that ear of unchecked steroid use in the mid-1990s, there's one unmistakable trait Gnic exhibits. The ladies just love how buff the guy is. I mean, it's just a bug, but he's ripped out of his mind. Gnic was the team's on field mascot during the Sandgnats early years, but was ultimately demoted. Well because business is just business and sometimes. We had to fire him in the early '90s because we caught him administering steroids to one of our players during the 7th inning stretch. Having since served a 20 year suspension, do we bring him back?

or do we stay with our current mascot?
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Gnate, pronounced Nate has been with us since we joined the PEBA. He is the front man for the "Gnaturals" dancing crew between innings. Children love him and he can be seen frequenting birthday parties and officiating weddings during the off-season. The Gnats have performed well under his tutelage but never won the big dance. Is it time for a change? He has also become well acquainted with helping lead the Dawg Pack led cheers during every save opportunity when Closer Ramón Contreras is out there crawling on the ground with his signature Doberman Bark after each save.

So fans its up to you. Call 555-555-5551 for Gnic and 555-555-5552 for Gnate. Voting closes January 1, 2024.
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#2 Post by roncollins »

555-555-5551
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#3 Post by Evas »

555-555-5551

Gnic is a waking nightmare, but I can't pull my eyes away.
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#4 Post by Borealis »

555-555-5551...

Only because when I dialed 555-555-5553 (no mascot), I got a recorded message saying 'this number is no longer in service'...
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#5 Post by Leones »

555-555-5551

No larvae should ever be a mascot.
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#6 Post by Borealis »

Leones wrote:555-555-5551

No larvae should ever be a mascot.
Excellent point!!!
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#7 Post by Sandgnats »

Well we could go with a giant sand dune filled with gnats by the beechers in center field.
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#8 Post by Leones »

Forgot to mention I rather like the edgy name of the blog. Nice! :grin:
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#9 Post by Sandgnats »

Thank you! Ms. Dole is working on a post about our pitching situation as her next piece.
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#10 Post by Borealis »

Sandgnats wrote:Well we could go with a giant sand dune filled with gnats by the beechers in center field.
Oh... So Hot!!!! Sort of like the Litter Box they used to have in San Diego back in the old MLB days... The kids loved the Tootsie Rolls they used to find out there...

(OK... sorry if I went too far there...)
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#11 Post by Morris Ragland »

555-555-5552. Going for the underdog.
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#12 Post by Denny »

I can't believe no one else has mentioned that Gnic also has very shapely legs as well (though is at least one pair short).

But Gnate is cuddly and wholesome.

Isn't there some way that you could keep them both!?
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#13 Post by Sandgnats »

Borealis wrote:
Sandgnats wrote:Well we could go with a giant sand dune filled with gnats by the beechers in center field.
Oh... So Hot!!!! Sort of like the Litter Box they used to have in San Diego back in the old MLB days... The kids loved the Tootsie Rolls they used to find out there...

(OK... sorry if I went too far there...)
Not a bad idea if we stink this year!
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This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#14 Post by Sandgnats »

This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats
By: Stephanie Dole
January 2, 2024 at 11:00 PM EST

Gnic Wins! In our last edition - we heard you. Gnic ("Nick) will return and be the mascot for the 2024 season. The club has no comment regarding the Al Jazeera report on PED use in the mascot ranks and possible links to Gnic.

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On a side note: With a little extra money to spend this off season, Crystal Lake signs four journeymen to contracts for the upcoming season to add some depth to the line-up.

25 year old RF António Valdéz - signed a one-year 1.8 million dollar deal.
Last season before being released as a free agent, Valdéz played in Yuma's minor league system for AA Calgary Stampede. He was selected to the 2023 Great Northern League All-Star Game. With 519 at bats he posted a .320/.383/.528 with 73 RBIs and 24 HRs. He looks to start this season in AAA Evansville and possibly compete for a backup role in the outfield for the major league club this spring training.

Depth was added at catcher with backups:
27 year old C José Olivas - signed a one-year $700,000 dollar deal. The career minor league player looks to sit at AAA Evansville and hopefully never needs to be called up this season.

31 year old C John Allen - signed a one-year $1.2 million dollar deal. Allen looks to compete with Ed Wood for the backup role at catcher this season after spending last season with Manchester playing in 51 games as the club's backup catcher. Although a below average hitter, he could be the defensive stop gap needed from time to time this season. He could also stand in as an emergency first baseman.

30 year old 2B Hubert Lee - signed a one-year $1 million dollar deal. He looks to serve as an insurance policy to Jim Klein as backup to compliment utility man SS Max Lee should Klein decide to break his hand for the 3rd year in a row. Hubert Lee looks to start the season in AAA Evansville or in a backup role for the major league club.
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Re: This Team Bites: Blog of the Crystal Lake Sandgnats

#15 Post by Leones »

Can't wait for the first non-day Sandgnats game when we'll get 'Gnic at night' <ducks>
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