We Could Get Away with It, Martin
Posted: Fri Oct 11, 2019 1:00 pm
Bears Bats Hibernate During SLDS
Shin Seiki, Japan - 18 October, 2029
"I'll kill him. I'll do it myself. We're in a foreign country. Japan won't care if an aging American baseball manager goes missing. Probably happens all the time." Bears GM Dan Vail spoke in an agitated but measured tone. With the season on the line and the Bears facing a 3-2 deficit, manager Wayne Kedsch had turned the game over to setup man Geoff Lawson in the bottom of the 8th. This was specifically contrary to what Vail had discussed with Kedsch prior to the game. With dominant closer Hsin-ta Lian and lefty Jeffry Mendoza available, and the murder's row of left handed slugging in the heart of the Evas lineup due up, Vail expected that one of the two would be called upon by his veteran manager. The two had often loudly disagreed about various baseball strategies. Usage of lefty-righty matchups was a sticking point between the two, but one that had rarely come up given the Bears lack of strong left-handed pitching. Vail, however, had discussed scenarios with Kedsch and believed this to be a textbook case of Kedsch's stubbornness over-riding common sense. Bears tormentor Luis Cervantes (9H, 3 2B, 2 HR for a 1.421 OPS in the series) led the inning off with a rocket double off a 2-1 pitch to the right center gap.
"Dontcha think they might investigate? He's clearly sabotaging our chances for their benefit. Whatcha think it cost them to bribe the old man?" Scouting Director Abel Martin goaded on, "Heck they might just make a big old Wayne statue after they hoist another trophy, eh?"
Vail seethed as he watched Kedsch signal for the intentional walk of the power-hitting lefty Felix Rodriguez (2 for 15 in the series) to bring up two time MVP Andres Hernandez (10 for 26, 3 2B, 2 HR in the series). "WHY WAYNE?! WHY??" Perhaps gambling on a potential double play, Kedsch made his calls as Vail could only agonize and plot from the box. As Hernandez approached, Vail felt his stomach churn at the danger of the matchup. Lawson had been unhittable in Duluth earlier this year, but had regressed back to his normal, solid self since the trade that brought him to Bakersfield. Still, Vail knew he'd struggled a bit recently and Hernandez was a red hot, RHP-destroying-thunder-god at the moment. "We can invite him to tour Fukushima with us. We just push him over a ledge. It'll look like he fell. They probably won't find him for months. We'll pay cash. Rent cars with no GPS and leave our phones in the hotel."
Several fouls and a three errant pitches later, and the count was full. "What are our contractual obligations after that? Do we owe the remaining years of salary to his estate?" Martin asked in a stone cold tone that would have given any juror pause, if not cause.
"Yes, but at least I won't have to look at his fat, smug face as he DESTROYS THE TEAM THAT I'VE BUILT WITH HIS DUMB OLD MAN BRAIN." Vail shouted, white-knuckling the rail overlooking Genesis Park. Foul ball and the count remains full.
"What about the radiation? Won't that hurt us?" Martin continued the game.
"Iodine pills. We'll take iodine pills." Vail answered summarily. Yet another foul, and the 7 pitch count would go to its 8th pitch still full.
"Presumin' that would work, 'cuz quite frankly boss I have just no idea, ya know, where the heck do we get iodine pills? I have to think that might make for an awkward exchange. 'Oh excuse me Mr. Japanese pharmacist, whereabouts might I find your iodine pills? No reason! I just like to check stocks when I'm out and about in foreign countries - " **CRACK** the launch of Lawson's 8th offering ascended majestically toward the stands, rudely interrupting the Canadian's attempt to relieve the tension in the room.
"Mother of God... It is an absolute curse, Martin, to be this right this often." With a now four run deficit, Vail and Abel sat mostly quietly as they watched the remainder of the 2029 season bleed away.
Shin Seiki, Japan - 18 October, 2029
"I'll kill him. I'll do it myself. We're in a foreign country. Japan won't care if an aging American baseball manager goes missing. Probably happens all the time." Bears GM Dan Vail spoke in an agitated but measured tone. With the season on the line and the Bears facing a 3-2 deficit, manager Wayne Kedsch had turned the game over to setup man Geoff Lawson in the bottom of the 8th. This was specifically contrary to what Vail had discussed with Kedsch prior to the game. With dominant closer Hsin-ta Lian and lefty Jeffry Mendoza available, and the murder's row of left handed slugging in the heart of the Evas lineup due up, Vail expected that one of the two would be called upon by his veteran manager. The two had often loudly disagreed about various baseball strategies. Usage of lefty-righty matchups was a sticking point between the two, but one that had rarely come up given the Bears lack of strong left-handed pitching. Vail, however, had discussed scenarios with Kedsch and believed this to be a textbook case of Kedsch's stubbornness over-riding common sense. Bears tormentor Luis Cervantes (9H, 3 2B, 2 HR for a 1.421 OPS in the series) led the inning off with a rocket double off a 2-1 pitch to the right center gap.
"Dontcha think they might investigate? He's clearly sabotaging our chances for their benefit. Whatcha think it cost them to bribe the old man?" Scouting Director Abel Martin goaded on, "Heck they might just make a big old Wayne statue after they hoist another trophy, eh?"
Vail seethed as he watched Kedsch signal for the intentional walk of the power-hitting lefty Felix Rodriguez (2 for 15 in the series) to bring up two time MVP Andres Hernandez (10 for 26, 3 2B, 2 HR in the series). "WHY WAYNE?! WHY??" Perhaps gambling on a potential double play, Kedsch made his calls as Vail could only agonize and plot from the box. As Hernandez approached, Vail felt his stomach churn at the danger of the matchup. Lawson had been unhittable in Duluth earlier this year, but had regressed back to his normal, solid self since the trade that brought him to Bakersfield. Still, Vail knew he'd struggled a bit recently and Hernandez was a red hot, RHP-destroying-thunder-god at the moment. "We can invite him to tour Fukushima with us. We just push him over a ledge. It'll look like he fell. They probably won't find him for months. We'll pay cash. Rent cars with no GPS and leave our phones in the hotel."
Several fouls and a three errant pitches later, and the count was full. "What are our contractual obligations after that? Do we owe the remaining years of salary to his estate?" Martin asked in a stone cold tone that would have given any juror pause, if not cause.
"Yes, but at least I won't have to look at his fat, smug face as he DESTROYS THE TEAM THAT I'VE BUILT WITH HIS DUMB OLD MAN BRAIN." Vail shouted, white-knuckling the rail overlooking Genesis Park. Foul ball and the count remains full.
"What about the radiation? Won't that hurt us?" Martin continued the game.
"Iodine pills. We'll take iodine pills." Vail answered summarily. Yet another foul, and the 7 pitch count would go to its 8th pitch still full.
"Presumin' that would work, 'cuz quite frankly boss I have just no idea, ya know, where the heck do we get iodine pills? I have to think that might make for an awkward exchange. 'Oh excuse me Mr. Japanese pharmacist, whereabouts might I find your iodine pills? No reason! I just like to check stocks when I'm out and about in foreign countries - " **CRACK** the launch of Lawson's 8th offering ascended majestically toward the stands, rudely interrupting the Canadian's attempt to relieve the tension in the room.
"Mother of God... It is an absolute curse, Martin, to be this right this often." With a now four run deficit, Vail and Abel sat mostly quietly as they watched the remainder of the 2029 season bleed away.
